December.

I will find you on a cold day

when I struggle to swallow last night’s dreams and the morning’s somber air that’s settled on my shoulders like a ruthless shudder wrapping up bare bones too fragile to withstand the coming day

but still i’ll put on my favourite sweater

and brush my teeth

I’ll still line my eyes and smile at my reflection

feed the voice in my head healthy thoughts I cannot even form in my dreams

I will still work hard,

or try to,

and in that final moment when my mind is no longer able to plaster the endless cracks breaking through it’s seams like rising dust at daybreak you’ll materialise and I won’t depend on you.

I won’t depend on you or wait for your hands to anchor my feet to this crumbling earth but

warm eyes silence this hurricane heart and even if just for a moment the settling tides of this distraction stir a little something in me

you won’t fix me but

we could all use a little warmth on cold days like today.

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